these, our bodies, possessed by light - first there is the road ...
tell me we'll never get used to it.
“Every morning another chapter where the hero shifts from one foot to the other. Every morning the same big and little words all spelling out desire, all spelling out you will be alone always and then you will die.” ― Richard Siken
Dean had taken the damn vest and name tag and tossed it at the manager before walking out. Finding Cas was much more important at this point. He frowned, walking across the parking lot to the Impala before sliding in and starting up. Okay, Cas had said he was staying at the Super 8 and had given him a room number so that is where he was gonna go.
He shifted slightly as he pulled out and drove down the street. He drummed his fingers against the steering wheel, humming softly. Thankfully the motel wasn't too far away and within ten minutes he was pulling into the parking lot. He looked at the numbers on the door before parking in the space in front of Cas' room.
As soon as Dean was at the door he knocked, leaning in so he could listen for any sounds in the room. "Yo, Cas its me!"
When he opens the door, Cas is looking much more serene than he sounded when he was on the phone. His room also smells like the sweet smoke of marijuana. Someone a few doors down had been smoking and had been kind enough to share. Cas is feeling much more relaxed now that he has some mood enhancers in his system.
"Dean! Come on in. It's not much but for the moment it will have to pass as home."
His nose wrinkled up as he slipped into the room past his friend. "God you're room....how much have you been smoking, Cas!?" He sighed, shaking his head a bit before looking at the man for a moment. "Christ I didn't ever want to see you like this again." He pulled Cas into a hug regardless, slapping his back lightly.
"Okay come on. Tell me whats going on and how you ended up here. I just quite my job to come see you. Not that it was a job I wanted." He smirked, pulling him towards the beds.
"I only smoked a bowl, and it was a small one. Relax." He's not even really high, just relaxed enough that he's not on edge about this whole surprise time travel business. Still he'll take the hug, even if Dean is bitching.
"Eh long story. What the hell are you doing working at Walmart anyway?" He shambles over to his bed and flops down on it.
"A bowl still smells." He flopped down on Cas' bed, watching him for a moment. "I'm constantly telling you to lighten up and then I see you like this again. I mean..its not exactly unwelcome seeing you be human, but the drugs freak me out. Always will."
He shifted over to give Cas room to flop down next to him, making a face. "I have no fucking clue. One minute me and Sam were at a diner in BFE fixing to eat and the next thing I know I'm sitting at that phone answering your call. Probably some dick angel's idea of a joke. Like, oh I don't know, Gabriel."
He shrugs, he likes the smell honestly. It's sweet and a little ... something else. He doesn't know. "I'm sorry it upsets you," and that's honest, because he has never liked being a disappointment to Dean, even if that is mostly what he is these days. "Mmm yes. That sounds about like Gabriel. Any idea where Sam is?"
"I can handle it. I just don't like seeing you like this, Cas. It worries me." He scooted closer, nudging the man with his shoulder. "Though you seem a lot...better than the future Cas I saw. He was more out of it. You seem pretty coherent even for being somewhat high."
He shrugged a bit. "Apparently he got thrown into a walmart too. He managed to call and he is gonna get a bus ticket out here."
Most of what Dean says makes him a little uncomfortable but it's nothing he isn't used to. He doesn't like disappointing the other man, but he's far too deep down the rabbithole now to worry about whether or not Dean likes his drug use and orgies. He's also not going try and explain any of it to him. It's only going to pile further guilt on Dean's shoulders and he doesn't need that. Not that he's at fault or anything but Cas knows Dean well enough to know he likes to blame himself for the world's problems at large. In the case of a friend's troubles, well he's probably already putting that on himself, the idiot.
"So what you got zapped to Walmarts on the opposite end of the country? And you just happened to land where I was, and I just happen to randomly appear here. Yeah that sounds like my brother."
"Yeah pretty much. Sam is somewhere around southern California from what he told me when I finally got him to answer his damn cellphone. If this is Gabriel...why would he throw you and me here and Sam way the hell there? You know him...he has a reason for everything." He reached over, clapping a hand on Cas' knee for a moment.
"When I find that asshole I'm going to smack him upside the head with a lead pipe. Might not do much to him, but at least I'll feel satisfied."
"I'm sorry I thought you just said Gabriel had a reason for everything. I must be more high than I realized." He snorts and shakes his head. "Gabriel doesn't always have a reason for the crap he pulls. Sometimes he's just bored. Though the fact that he's screwed with you often enough when he did have a purpose that now you are wondering what he wants with you is probably amusing him to no end."
He snorts at Dean's threat and flops backward on the bed so he's staring at the ceiling. "I wouldn't recommend it. He might put it somewhere you won't like."
"Pretty much every single time he's messed with me and Sam he had a reason. Oh...oh what if he's doing something to Sam?" He looked a little panicked for a moment, looking at Cas and making a face. "But...wait that still wouldn't explain why he dropped you and me in the same town together." He wished he knew what the hell to do here.
"I'm not worried about that flying monkey." He said quietly, scooting closer to Cas slightly. "So, you're fully human now right? You...you mind if I ask about it? I never got the chance to get the full story. Including what happened between you and...other me."
Cas just groans at all of it. He doesn't want to talk about any of it. It's all one big bundle of sore topics that he'd do anything at all to avoid. He has enough awkward painful crap with his own Dean, he really doesn't need to start anymore here with this one. This should be a vacation for him. A break from the apocolypse.
"Hey I have a better idea. Lets talk about how great it is that this hotel has free cable."
"I didn't come here to talk about free fucking cable, Cas." He sighed, shrugging his shoulders and letting his head thunk back against the headboard. "I'm sorry if you don't want to talk about it, but maybe I'm trying to stop it from happening." He said, shaking his head before turning his attention back to the tv.
"I thought....I don't know. I thought things would be different, but the other me could barely look at you. He was so angry. I don't want that to happen."